Review: Fast X

Dear god, what the hell are these filmmakers on? I WANT SOME! This movie is an unfiltered blast of Fast and Furious action, in both the good and the bad, and hits you with a two-parter ending that really leaves more questions than answers. Please tune in as we discuss Fast X.

PLOT: Dumb as rocks.

The main thing Fast and Furious is known for is it's bonkers stories and nigh-invulnerable superheroes. But, its plots... are forgettable and dumb. The story really just centers around a villain who was written to be a reflection of their past mistakes. Realistically? You're not watching a movie like this for the plot.

CHARACTERS: Dumb as rocks.

Every single character is either a stereotype, cliche, or just ungodly talented at literally everything. Characters are telegraphed to die before they do. The villains are thrown in and the only entertaining part of all of this is Jason Momoa doing his best to audition for Joker in the new DCU. The arcs are engaging, but most people are here to watch the characters say one-liners and jokes. Realistically, if you're here for deep character arcs, you'll be disappointed.

SHOTS: Dumb as rocks.

Nah, nothing of substance here. Move along.

MUSIC: Dumb as rocks.

Sadly nothing else here. Music is kinda just lots of rap and techno music. It's okay but barely memorable. Moving along.

WRITING: Dumb as rocks.

Where the films always stand out is in their dumb as hell writing and obnoxiously saccarine remarks about family. It never gets old hearing some of the dumb stuff spewed by Dom Toretto, as most of it is clearly just being written by Vin Diesel at this point. It's gotten to the point of essentially being a shonen anime but just live action. It's compelling in its stupidity, but not compelling enough to carry this beyond average.

CONS: Dumb as rocks.

Most of the problems exist as part of the script and characters. There's no real reason to be tied to anyone or anything, you're just watching action scene after action scene for the sake of entertainment and nothing really tethering it. These movies lose a lot by not carrying the heart of Furious 7, a film which did a lot of these characters and emotions much better than the recent films have. Sadly, I doubt the writing will ever really get to being that good again.

VERDICT: DUMB. AS. ROCKS!

Please, I highly implore audiences of more cultured taste to look elsewhere. But, for the people who love dumb, fun action such as myself, I encourage going to watch this film. It's stupid, loud, and revels in all of it. Not much to say otherwise.

SCORE: 5/10